Unless there is something wrong with your system, all the functionality you referenced exists in Strawberry.
To shuffle a playlist, right click on the playlist and select "Shuffle playlist", or press Ctrl+H. The shuffle buttons are only for setting the actual playback behavior.
To jump to the currently playing track, press Ctrl+J. You can also select this in Menu > Playlist.
You found the star. Not sure why this was not evident. Maybe something with your theme, making the icon hard to see?
Use your hover tooltips to get useful info. Also, right click menus have many, many options. And explore keyboard shortcuts. They can be handy.
Finally, a suggestion -- When you post, try not to let it devolve into a rant right off the bat. Tighten up your writing; less stream of consciousness. That was a formidable wall of text. 😉
Hope you get things sorted and can enjoy Strawberry. It's a great application! Good luck!
